Fabulous Photo

Yesterday my new Texas ID came in the mail. I was pleasently surprised at how GOOD the photo was. This is probably the BEST photo I've ever had for photo ID. Don't take my word for it, see for yourself.



This was me at 18. Let's not even mention the hair.


This one is about 8 or 9 years ago. I affectionately call it the Weeble picture because I look like a fucking Weeble. I was about 50 lbs heavier than I am now and on steriods for a medical thing.



And THIS is my current photo! I'm so shocked that it looks good. I'm considering going back and getting my holiday photos taken there. :o)

How To Move Up A Notch On My Hit List

Ask me to reach down the garbage disposal to retreive something you dropped down there because your big ol' gorilla hands won't fit down it. I just love sticking my hand in squishy wet food scraped off the dinner plates.

It's Over

I'm glad Thanksgiving is over. I don't really like Thanksgiving.

Eh... I'm not motivated to write... well I'm really not in a good mood. I'm fighting the urge to draw little illustrations of how I feel but that would be just stupid, so I won't.

That's enough for now. I'm sure tomorrow I'll feel different.

Illustration Friday: Cling



This is how I seem to find most of my socks these days.

This is my very late submission for last weeks Illustration Friday: Regal


I was on my way to spend the weekend with XXX. XXX had a suggestion for Regal, which would have fit well, but might be a tad bit of too much information to be sharing. ;o)

Blogger Trouble

I'm not sure what is going on with blogger, I haven't been able to get to my actually blog page (and that of many other people as well). Very frustrating, I have photos of my delicious Thanksgiving dinner and a cute photo of Bea eating a pumpkin cookie piece.

Being Thankful

Last night before we ate (gorged on) Thanksgiving dinner Super Girl made everyone go through a list of what we are thankful for. She was funny, she would continue to prompt us "What else?" untill we finally told her we were done.

Here is my list:

I am thankful for my dear family, they support me when I need it and love me. What more could I ask for from them.

I am thankful for XXX being in my life, I never imagined love could feel like this. Thank you XXX for putting up with my crap.

I'm thankful for my dear friends and for the encouragement and support they extend to me. I am often humbled by the emotional generosity they have.

I am thankful for the opportunities before me and hope that I have the courage to take advantage of them and succeed.

Thats it for now, I need to get on to work.

Golden Nugget Squash


Recently I purchased the above mentioned squashed. It was something new to try and it was fairly cheap.

Last night I decided it would make a lovely addition to our steak dinners. Boy was I misinformed. It's not that it tasted bad or anything like that. To be honest I have no idea what it taste like at all. I could NOT cut it open. It is hard as a ROCK! At one point I asked K to come in and hold the squash so I woudln't end up cutting my fingers if it slipped. (HE DID!) After several minutes of trying to saw open the damn thing with a big serated knife, I finally set it aside for another day (when I could find my chain saw or at the very least a hacksaw).

Later...

I take back all the bad things I said about the hard as nails gold nugget squash. After cooking it's quite delightful. And how did I manage to cook it... well let me give directions on how to cook a Golden Nugget Squash.

First purchase one very hard golden nugget squash. Throw it at someone's head if you are you are uncertain of it's hardness. It should have about the same effect as throwing a coconut at someone's head. If not, look for harder squash.

Next head home with the intentions of makeing the squash for a quick addition to dinner.

Try to cut squash open with every cutting utensile in the knife drawer, briefly consider smacking it with hammer. Give up after a half an hour and only putting a small gash in the side. Put in fridge while muttering swear words under breath.

Day two, search the internet for how to prepare golden nugget squash and make sarcastic comments every time a recipe starts with "cut up squash". Find one vague reference to cooking the squash whole.

Place whole squash (with gash in side) in pan and bake in 350 degree oven until the small pumpkin next to it is fork tender (Hey, I needed to cook my pumpkin) which would be about an hour or two.

After pumpkin is cooked, remove pan and allow both pumpkin and squash to cool. Later, take large knife and start to cut open whole squash with gash in side. Be surprised at how easy it is to cut squash now. Remove seeds and add butter and salt to pulp, mix well and enjoy.

It's easy! :o)

Doing Like The Pilgrams



Except I have electricty, and running watter and I didn't have to kill my own turkey and I have a Thank-the-gods-for-this-invention microwave oven and instant potatoes (yeah, yeah, I know, burn me at the steak, I like instant taters). I do make my own pumpkin pie, right down to the crust.

This morning Super Girl and I have been cleaning the kitchen and making pumpkin pie. This is a landmark day for me. Today was the FIRST time that Super Girl was ACTUALLY helpful. Generally when the Little People 'help' it means that I have to watch and moniter everything they do and fix what doesn't get done. This morning was different, she actually did what was asked and did it right. We made pumpkin pie tarts together and she was a great help.

Cabbage Patch however was her usual 3 year old self, that is to say EVIL in a cute covering. I'm glad it's nap time for her as I'm tired of dealing with her constant argueing, hitting, biting and just being mean.

Back to baking.

Clarification

I sometimes wonder if I only portray my love for XXX as purely sexual. If so I must appologize, it's simply not so. The sex IS fucking fantastic, but I was mad about him long before I drug him off for carnal pleasures. XXX is incredibly sexy, and he's intelligent - I go weak in the knees for a smart man, and if he's hot and sexy too, well I'm just a puddle. He's funny, so funny in fact he can make me laugh hard enough to make milk come out of my nose - even when I'm not drinking milk! A man with a good sense of humor is terribly important as I'm an incredible dork and say stuid things before my brain kicks in to stop the mouth. Laughter is almost as much fun as multiple orgasms. He's humble, arrogant men are as much of a turn off as stupid men. He's interesting, I love talking to him - and a man who is a good conversationalist is better than calorie/fat free Godiva chocolates (which don't exist, but they would be great). And most of all, XXX is just a great guy. I could go on for a while about what I like about him, but I know most of you are starting to feel light headed and nauseated already from the sickley sweetness of it all so I'll stop for now.

Anyway, it's not ALWAYS about sex with me. ;o)

The WHOLE Fucking Week!

That's how long Super Girl is off from school. It's day two of her break and I'm seriously considering suing the county for wasting my tax dollars that are supposed to be going to paying teacher salaries. I have never been more supportive of year round school than at this very moment.

Why does my kid get a whole fucking week off for Thanksgiving? I mean really. I don't recall ever getting a week off for Thanksgiving. Why do they need the WHOLE WEEK off? I'm looking forward to going to work on Thursday and Friday (and the weekend as usual).

Don't get me wrong I love my progeny dearly. I just don't see why one needs a week off right now. See screwing with the offsprings schedule is a disasterous proposition. As in my home becomes a disaster in a matter of seconds.

This is how my morning went. 7:20 AM I am awakened by the sound of Super Girl wanting breakfast. 15 minutes later Cabbage Patch joins us downstairs. I go to kitchen to make her breakfast. When both are eating I leave room (my first mistake) for a moment, when I return the tsunami of toys has over taken my living room floor. As I wade through the flood of toys and crap littering the floor I discover soggy Cherrios (with my bare foot no less) on the floor. 8 AM, breakfast is finish the requests for the clean up crew begins. 9 AM the requests continue. 9:30 AM the requests get more urgent. 10 AM the requests get more desperate (and angry). 10:15 AM my head spins around 7 times then pops off my neck and flies around the room like someone let go of an inflated balloon. When my head reattaches itself to my neck it's just an angry looking skull with flames shooting out of the eye sockets. The unearthly voice coming from the mouth is mine but sounds as though it's come from the very bowles of hell as I bark out orders and threats to the Tiny Terrorists. 'PICK UP YOUR DAMN SHOES!' is repeated more times than I can count but eventually the army of toys is beaten back and forced to retreat to their holding areas and every last scrap of damn paper is picked up off the floor. I was able to vaccuum and am pleased that all the sofa cushions are ON the couch. About the time I went to make lunch my skin returned to my skull and I extinguished my flaming eyes. Yes it really did happen that way, you're invited to the next incident, no flash photography please.

Things are back to normal for the moment but I'm still wishing they made Valium in a childrens chewable tablet.

On days like these occasionally I'm reminded that when Super Girl was an infant I had this insane thought of home schooling her. Bwhahahahahahahahahahaha!

Okay now it's time for my first cup of coffe for the day.

Bragging Because I Can

Have any of you ever had such a fabulous and amazing experience that you just HAD to tell other people about it no matter how dorky it may make you sound? Have any of you ever found something you thought you lost and were so freaking excited that you just had to tell all your friends? That's what I'm doing. I had both happen to me simultaniously this weekend. I'm sure you are wondering what I'm talking about, sex, that's what I'm talking about, sex. If you don't want to hear about my sex life (even vaguely) then now's your time to turn back.

Not only is XXX so damn sexy I have to make a concerted effort to keep my hands off him in public, he's also funny, intelligent and incredibly talented. Luckily for me he's talented in bed. *sigh* Yesterday morning we had the most amazing and incredible sex, and in the process of that the G-Spot was found! See, didn't I tell you he was talented?!?!?! I'm not sure if I should have a bronze plaque made for him or just send him a thank you note. Now don't get me wrong, we always always have really really wonderful sex, but Sunday morning was so good almost a religious experience... actually maybe it was, I do recall calling out to a higher power several times... *sigh*

He makes a damn good breakfast too! Am I not the luckiest woman in the world.

Weekend Update

I can sum it up in one word - spectacular. *sigh* What a nearly perfect weekend. Wish it could have lasted a bit longer. It was great though, I'm sure I'll be smiling about it for quite a while I'm sure. I hope XXX's neighbors didn't mind the noise too much.

More details on it later... maybe. ;o)

Yes Man, I'm Going To Tell Him, He Can Use A Laugh

Oh but the bus ride home. That was something else. As fate would have it, I did not get my usual sleep time on the bus on the way home. Some guy smelling of cheap booze started hitting on me. He asked what I had been doing in the city and I told him I had been visiting my boyfriend a bit later in the conversation he asked if I was going to tell my boyfriend that I had talked to him and I laughed saying that I was going to tell my boyfriend that some drunk guy was hitting on me on the bus. He said "No man, don't tell your boyfriend I was hitting on you!" This of course did not stop him from hitting on me and asking for my phone number no less than 10 times (said like this "You're gonna give me your number right?"). He was harmless and relatively nice when he wasn't trying to make moves on me. Here are some comical bits and pieces of the conversation that took place on the long ride home.

Him: That's too bad.
Me: What?
Him: That's too bad you got a boyfriend and you're faithful to him.
Me: Yeah that's too bad for you! HAHAHAHAHA!
Him: Awww man, did you just say that's too bad for me?
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!

Him: *putting arm around me*
Me: *removing arm from around me* I don't think so.
Him: My arm is just tired. *putting arm around me again*
Me: *removing arm from around me again* Your arm can be tired right next to you.

(after brief discussion on breast implants and how one can tell fake from the real)
Him: Are those real? *pointing at my chest*
Me: Hmm??? Yes.
Him: Can I touch them?
Me: What? No!
Him: Oh come on, just let me feel them so I know the difference.
Me: NO! You got 4 kids, I'm sure you've felt enough real titties in your life. These one's aren't for you. *pointing to chest* Property of XXX.
Him: That's not even funny. I gave you that line. (the property of line in an earlier conversation)

Me: *removing his hand from my leg*
Him: Oh sorry, I thought that was my leg *putting hand back on my leg*
Me: *removing his hand from my leg again* Uh no.
Him: But... *moving hand back towards my leg*
Me: *blocking his hand* Hands off.
Him: awww...

Heh. He wasn't a total pig the whole ride to Dallas, early on since he was drunk he kind of rambled on and mumbled a lot. I did a lot of laughing at him, which he didn't seem to appreciate but it didn't disuade him in the least from hitting on me nor did it make him want to move. Ah well, I guess I need to try harder next time.

C-Section Comments

I read this article about how more and more women are delivering via c-sections. I read the line where it said that c-sections are still uncommon and almost choked on my coffee. That is so not true I thought. C-sections are VERY common. I work in a hospital taking photos of newborn babies, I know who has had a vaginal delivery and who has had a c-section. C-sectons are NOT uncomon. Then I thought of something else, c-sections are almost the norm in one of my hospitals, about even split in another hospital and not done often at the other hospital. What is the difference? I'll tell you. Economics. The hospital that has the MOST c-section is in a more afluent area and a majority of thoes who deliver at that hospital are at least firmly in the middle class earning bracket, many are in the upper class earning bracket (professional sport personalities wives, CEO's wives, doctors, etc.). Rarely do I see women who are Medicade patiences. At the hospital with the even split I see mostly middle income families and lower income families with a few Medicade patients. At the hospital with the lowest c-section rate I see mostly low income families, imigrants, people from rural communities further out and a lot of Medicade patients.

I agree with the statements of the article that people seek control over their lives, but I also see how economics makes doctors more willing to offer c-sections for convenience. Kind of sad really. I'll keep the rest of my comments and opinions regarding c-sections and child birth to myself as I KNOW I would offend some who read this site. ;o)

Flowers


I do love flowers. I try to grow some every year (usually unsuccessfully). I love being given flowers for any reason. Cabbage Patch gave me the bunch you see above.

This morning as I walked Super Girl to the bus stop one of her class mates called out her name and met her with a flower in his hand. She turned to me and beamed, he gave her the best kind of flower for a 5 year old - a perfect, fluffy wish flower (the dandilon seed thingies that blow away). I wish I had of had my camera at that very moment.

I'm Getting My Geek Card Revoked For Missing This

I totally missed that on the 15th D&D turned 30. As I've been telling all of my gaming friends for years and years, I am NOT a gaming geek, I just play the game and have since I was 9, but that does NOT make me a gaming geek, nor does the fact that I regularly attend AD&D games or that I have more than 10 characters on file or that I have a few characters that I have developed and played for a minimum of 5 years... that does NOT make me a gaming geek. I'm a part time gamer. I enjoy the company of my friends that's all.

Tonight's Message Brought To You By The Letter P...

As in P for PANIC. I'm leaving in less than 24 hours to spend the weekend with my sweetie (XXX) and I have nearly nothing done. It's time to panic. I haven't packed any clothes (probably won't need much though). Panic. I haven't packed the lingerie I plan to wear but won't even manage to put on. Panic. I haven't packed up my sex toys (don't worry, they WILL be going, even if nothing else get's packed BOB and Friends will be on this trip). PANIC! I haven't shaved my legs and they are really really frightening. Panic. I haven't done my illustration for Illustration Friday (although I do have a concept for something cool). Panic. I haven't EVEN started on the writing project that is now my hands as it's MY turn. PANIC!

*sigh* I let this stuff get to me, I swear I do, then I feel all stress and do things I don't mean to, like eat my Sacred Elvis Samich. Damn.

Well I have many many things to do, so I better get started.

Wax On, Wax Off

I've been waxing recently, not poeticly or philosophically, but the depilatory type of waxing. It was that time of year once again, when it is necessary to eradicate my undesirable hair growth. Over the years I have discovered that waxing is the ideal way to rid myself of the thick black mustache and gotee combo I possess. (I'd opt for a more permament solution such as laser hair removal but I'm counting on the impressive beard to keep me employed in my silver years, carnival life sounds delightful and prefferable to a nursing home). I don't worry about the back hair as I have long hair that can cover it and in a pinch I can just braid it into my hair... heh... kidding... stop grimacing, I don't have back hair... yet... Anyway since I have a booty call, er, visit with XXX this coming weekend I felt it was an ideal time to get out the scalding wax, pour it on my skin and violently rip the whiskers out of my body. It's very relaxing. Cabbage Patch was quite interested in what I was doing and as she is just 3 she wasn't even remotely repulsed (like you probably are). After I had finished my mild torture session of which I have gotten quite used to, I had this brilliant (read INSANE) thought that maybe I'd just go ahead and wax my legs since I needed to mow them and the wax was still hot. Yeah, that's where my troubles began. YEARS and YEARS ago I used to wax my legs and at one time I had THE primo-bad-ass Israelie Torture Device - an Epilady (they were made in Israel - eh at least it was Kosher). I can't remember much of my Epilady sessions other than they hurt, I'd black out and somehow I'd end up with the smoothest legs ever. I lost that frightening device when I could not find some kind of battery adapter so I could carry it in my purse as a safety device - (I guarantee that any man would scream like a little girl, drop to their knees and cry if one were to slap an Epilady on any part of their hairy anatomy). But I digress, I've since had gall bladder pain bad enough to send me to the emergency room and I've birthed two children, one completly without medication in the back livingroom of my then home with her coming out feet first. I know pain. I wax other parts of my body, I figured this would probably hurt less than waxing my 'stache. Oh my arrogants would be my down fall. I painted my leg from my knee all the way down to my foot with a three inch wide strip of warm wax. My fingers ripped up the first piece of wax at the bottom and I swear I started to cry. My three year old was deeply concerned, patted my foot and said "It okay mamma. You be alright." I was up shit creek at this point, I had removed about an inch and a half of wax from the bottom and still had to get the rest off. I HAD to. I briefly considered leaving it and maybe my hair would grow fast enough for me to trim under the wax but then realzied that would not work as my sister was already on her way over. I steadied myself with several shots of tequila - kidding, kidding, I'm totally out of tequila and the beer in the fridge is what I imagine cat piss tastes like - and I ripped again. The next strip hurt so bad I felt as though I would pass out but I had to continue. More reassurance from my offspring as I tore off the rest, I felt dizzy and a out of breath, I was sweating and crying like a big baby. I swear I must have burned off quite a bit of bad karma just on that single strip of wax. I did not however continue my endevors to wax. By the time D arrived the swelling had gone down, I was breathing normally and I could walk straight again. I had survived the Deadly WAX unscathed - except mentally, I could swear I was having disturbing dreams last night of having my legs waxed by demented midgets.

Random Stuff (stolen from A)

Grab the nearest book.
Open the book to page 23.
Find the fifth sentence.
Post the text of the sentence in your journal......along with these instructions.

'The Stranger Beside Me' By Ann Rule

Ted Bundy became a paid work-study student at about the time I became a volunteer.

heh... I suppose I need to keep some porn near the computer, would sound much more interesting. ;o)

Pretty Damn Good Day So Far!

Today is turning out to be fucking fabulous! After an exciting day yesterday of runing errands with D and having her buy stuff for me and the little people (early Channukah)I was getting all in gear to visit XXX this weekend. That means cleaning and doing laundry and obsessivly going over my list of things (sex toys) to pack for the visit and rummaging through my lingerie drawer for the PERFECT thing to not wear. All was going as planned. Then D makes a few calls and move some things on her schedule so that she can take me to the bus early in the day and can watch the Little People. YAY! Right after we get off the phone I get a call from Albertsons. They have found my drivers license! After all that searching and calling it's been there the whole damn time. Fuckers. I called twice to ask if they had it and NOOOOOOOOO. Ahh well... No matter, at least it has been found now. The ironic thing... yesterday one of the places D toom me was to the DMV to get a new TX ID (my liscense is suspended for reasons that I won't go into on here as they totally piss me off and make my head spin... I'll save that angry rant for some other time). Heh. It's a good day so far.

Holy Samich


So here I was making an early lunch for me and Cabbage Patch and lo and behold what do I see on my freshly made cheese samich? A picture of some chick in a head scarf. I'm not really sure who it is, but the samich was damn tasty. ;o)



On the samich I was making for Cabbage Patch I could not believe the Holy image that showed up. ELVIS! She had taken a bite out of it before I could snatch it away and tuck it in a Tupperware container (packed with cotton balls). It's now sitting on my night stand. Hope I don't get hungry in the middle of the night.

eBay Pulls Listing

For Virgin Mary Cheese Sandwich! I can not believe them! I would LOVE to see that. I know that if I had a food item that looked like a saint I'd sell it! Unfair of eBay to not let her sell her holy sandwich. I'd like to know who bid $22,000 on this 10 year old sandwich.

(later)

Well it appears that eBay has decided that her listing is not a hoax and her samich is relisted. Place a bid on the samich!

You are 87% Leo

How much do you match your zodiac sign?

Is anyone surprised?

Just In Time For The Holidays!

I have found the perfect Hanukkah presents for everyone! Ebola, Flesh Eating Bacteria, Sleeping Sickness, Mono and The Common Cold. I personally want The Plague.

Mysteries Of The Universe

Children don't understand or apperciate the concept of sleeping in. My offspring were up at 6:30 AM. Just after I smacked my alarm clock into submission (just for a short time), my door opens and I hear Super Girl calling my name. *sigh* I yelled at her to go back to bed and of course she had to argue with me, every second taking me further and further away from my delicate snoozing state and my ever so delightful dream. When she finally acquiesced to my demands (or so I thought), I rolled over and snuggled my pillow close trying to find the dream I was engrossed in when I was so rudely interupted but alas it was not to be. It had already vaporized like fog being burned off by the sun - it also didn't help that I started hearing both progeny making noise, not sleeping in their beds like angelic little children.

Dear Offspring;

For the love of mom, please, please, please sleep in. Try it, you will like it. I guarantee you are NOT missing ANYTHING by sleeping in.

Love
Mom

Ugh. Off to get ready for work and hope this sinus headache disipates.

The Tooth Fairy

Well I finally got Super Girl on the Tooth Fairy's schedule. Okay, okay, I suck for not getting the whole Tooth Fairy thing already done with. It's been a little over a week since she lost that tooth. Stop giving me the dirty looks.

Here is the most recent Tooth Fairy Letter:

November 12, 2004

Ms. Tooth Fairy
101 Fantasy Street
Toothland

Dearest Ms. Fairy;

I would like to thank you very much for the two coins I received for my last tooth. I recently lost another tooth (my forth tooth).

I again am requesting a new tooth to replace this one – also I would like to know if I can get an estimate on when the replacement tooth for the last tooth will be in. I currently am sporting quite an impressive gap in the front. This is fine for now as I am just 5 years old, but eventually I’ll be 6 and I’m not sure I would like to be 6 and have such a large gap in the front.

I am certain that mommy has provided you with my tooth as she did before (in the envelope). I am requesting three shiny coins in exchange for the tooth. I will look for them in the envelope tomorrow morning.

I will make certain that mommy sets up her coffee maker again for you as well as setting out the last remaining packet of hot chocolate (so you don’t piss of mommy by using her Splenda). Just heat the water in the coffee maker and add the chocolate mix.

Also try not to spook the gerbil, she can be quite jumpy at times.

Much warmth,

Super Girl

And the reply:

November 12, 2004

Super Girl
Some Street
Somewherein, Texas

My dearest sweet Super Girl;

Thank you dearly for your precious tooth. I am pleased to learn that you have in fact been very good at taking care of your lovely teeth. Keep up the good work! Brush morning and night and floss too!

Patience dear child, teeth don’t grow on trees you know. I have arranged for replacements for your missing teeth and they will be there in their own due time. Have no fear you shall have front teeth when you are 6, I am confident it will make eating apples much easier.

Please accept these three shiny coins in exchange for your precious tooth.

Thank you for the tasty cup of hot chocolate (I didn’t use your mother’s Splenda, she really needs to get over that obsession). Now I’m off to finish my night of gathering shiny baby teeth!

Wishing you much love and shiny teeth,

Ms. Tooth Fairy


Someday she'll thank me for the efforts I put into this. Either that or she'll use all the bits and pieces of information I've carefully documented to prove my insanity and have me locked away in a nice cushie cell. Either way, I'm sure I'll apreciate her reaction.

Winter Has Crept In

Truly it has. I was in total denial until just this morning. It's 50 today (I know, that's not all that cold for some places, but her it's considered cold). I turned on my heater last night. I've been enjoying the cooler temperatures, just not the windy mornings. It's been cold for several days, I suppose it's time to admit to winter being here and drag out the rarely used sweaters and jackets. Blah. I prefer less clothing. I wear shorts most of the time (even now, I'm in shorts, I'll change to pants when the time comes for me to fetch Super Girl from the bus stop). It's odd for it to be 50 right now, I think I recall at least one day last week that it was a steamy 90 (it rained that day so it was nasty humid).

My cat is read for winter I suppose, she has started her annual Search For Heat. She spends much of her waking hours searching for a WARM spot, stalking any person, just waiting for them to sit so she can suck the heat out of them. She is the most cold natured cat I've ever had. Her tiny paws are always cold. When a nice warm human is unavailable (or won't sit still in the case of Cabbage Patch) I sometimes find her under an afgan or in someone's bed under the covers. Occasionally I'll pity her and turn on the heating pad for her to sit on. Poor cat, I need to knit her a sweater.

Anyway, I'm enjoying the weather even if it does force me to wear more clothing than usual.

Friday Illustration: Vintage


Here is my Friday Illustration. A sea turtle. What could be more vintage than a beautiful old sea turtle? They are my favorite sea creature.

Unfortunately the photo is just of a small portion of the picture as the detail is lost when it's taken larger (the crispness of the picture is lost in the photo still). I had intended to do this in color but he looked so good in black and gray that I left him as is.

Enjoy.

Later... (9:23pm)

Here is the big picture.

A Pox On My DSL Provider!

Damn it! My DSL has been down most of the fucking day. And for an internet addict like me, that is TORTURE. Well not really... I was actually finishing up a sewing project when I realized it was down - my internet radio stopped. It's irritating because I need to read what Petey wrote so I can write my part after the Little People are in bed and if I can't access the internet I can't read what's been written. I hate to admit it but I haven't read since Friday so I'm desperately in need of the internet. I know you're thinking - so go read now! I would, but I only have a few minutes to be on line, currently I'm tieing up our phone line to access the internet and I don't like ot do that. *sigh*

I need my DSL.

New Spider


One of the perks of living right next to a creek is that there is always some fabulous part of nature right near me - something is always new to me (like the racoon family we see at night as they head to the dumpster for a tasty dinner of garbage de jour or the persimion trees peeking out of the wooded area). One of the bad parts of living next to the creek is that there is an abundance of insects and therefore a favorite area for SPIDERS. Big icky spiders.

I dislike spiders quite a bit. Wait, wait, that's a lie. I despise spiders. I fear them. K is not of the same mind where these icky eight legged beasts are concerned. He shows compassion to the horrid eight legged ones while I look to annihilate them. Over the years we've come to a sort of agreement, spiders who violate the rules of my home (i.e. no non rent paying tenants other than thoes I've given birth to) are to be killed and the ones who respect my boundries and stay the hell out of my house will be left unmolested.

After spawning I realized that I didn't want to pass on this particular nerosis to my offspring and have gone out of my way to show the Little People that spiders aren't so bad (even though it takes an enormous amount of will power on my part). I show the Little People spiders outside and we even take pictures of the particularly nasty looking ones. I have of course taught them the rules of the house. They will dutifully stomp, smack or otherwise decimate any crawly thing that invades our home. Heh. I did this because K has taken up a capture and release policy despite my protests (see, this is my reasoning - if you release said icky thing back into the wild, that just gives it the opportunity to prepare for it's return to my home to terrorize me).

The picture above is the NEWEST Spider around. It's taken up residence outside the window near the front door. As long as it stays there, I will not spray it with a handy and lethal aresol.

Tireing Weekend

I'm tired today. I'm not sure if it's from the weekend (which was busy) or if it's from the sinus medication I took last night to vanquish the horrid sinus headache that had been pummeling me all afternoon. At any rate it was a busy weekend. I'm far to tired to even rehash it here on the blog. It makes me need a nap just thinking about it.

High points of the weekend: Went to see The Incredibles on Friday night. Fuck that was a good movie! I want to see it again. Game on Saturday night which I had not intended to attend but kind of got roped in and wanted to hang out with my friends (Okay, I really just wanted to sit on the couch with The New Mrs. S and talk about makeup while making catty comments). I didn't get home until 1:30 am. Ugh... that's painful when I have to get up at 6:30 am for work. Sunday went to see Shark Tale after work. It's an okay movie - not worth seeing for full price. Last night slept on the couch while K made dinner. Macaroni and cheese. Mmmmmm... Woke up to eat and negotiate bed time with the Little People. Watched half of the Farscape episodes The Queen taped for us (thank you!!!). K drugged me and I went to bed.

Whew. I still need a nap.

Illustration Friday


Today is Illustration Friday, suject:Search.

I got this off a very cool site Penelope Illustrations.

Pumpkin Soup

That's what's for dinner. It's good. I like it. K loves it. He asked for it. The little people will not eat it I am certain of that. It's good though. Ya know what's not good? I'll tell you - that BUSH won. FUCK. 4 more fucking years of this administration. What the fuck were the just over 50% of the US thinking???? No really! What? *breathing deeply, count to 10 slowly* Pumpkin soup. It's easy to make. And it doesn't taste like pumpkin pie. But it's good. It's so easy to make, even Bush could understand it! I don't understand how anyone who watched the debates could come away from them thinking "Hot damn, that man is brilliant! I think he needs to be in office for four more fucking years!" HOW???? I watched and often yelled at Bush asking him what kind of a fucking moron he truly is and why the fuck the man who's leading this country can't make a coherent statement??? And why all the lies? *sigh... must center one's self... think happy thoughts* Pumpkin soup. My soup is a little spicy, that's how I like it. It's warm. Always a nice comforting food for a cold night. (It's a bit nippy here) Very unlike the feeling I get from the thought of the current administration being in charge for 4 more fucking years!!! Why? And Kerry, why concede so quickly? I was kind of hopeing he'd do an Al Gore and bitch and moan until everything was counted and counted twice! Damned Ohio. What a disapointing election turn out. At least my soup is good.

Impressive Produce


I bought this massive cucumber the other day - and not because I miss XXX either, I have strictly platonic relationships with produce. As we walked home K joked "who knew a trip to the grocery store could be like part of a gay porn script" (we also saw the GAYEST man in our city in the store - seriously he was giving off some major GAY vibes.

Halloween Photos

Because every other mom authored blog I read (which isn't many to be honest) has a photo of their costumed children on it, I felt the pressure to conform.


I'm not sure why the two kids on the end look like they are in front of a fireing squad. Still it's a nauseatingly cute photo. Somedays I am truely amazed that my ovaries created them. (*note: only the cute female children are my progeny, the male is their cousin).



I like these photos, they were taken at the GAYEST party I've EVER been too. No really, it was that gay - it was a gay/lesbian parents group. I think I was one of two straight people (not counting kids) at the party. I like the photo of Cabbage Patch because she was being so nauseatingly cute that I heard how incredibly cute she was at least 8 times in a 5 minute span - this picture reflects her true Evil chocolate munching self.

Okay, okay, I'm done with the hormonal photo posting... at least until the next overly cute holiday photo op.

Go Vote!

If you already haven't.

And Angry Albino Sock Monkey would like to add:



But I wouldn't if I were you, I just can't endorse voting for any spiteful little primate who feels that throwing feces is great source of fun.... hmmm.... that kind of rules out the other candidates also now doesn't it... eh, well just go vote.

Our Halloween Costumes



I made K's costume. (the spot on the sleeve is just a spot on the photo) I just wore my rennie garb (I didn't go for eye popping cleavage since we were taking the little people out trick-or-treating - I sure wasn't looking for any tricks and I wasn't out to treat anyone!) Yeah I know, I looked so freaking happy. Oh well.

Halloween (sorta) Party

We had a surprise party this Saturday. We didn't have any plan and the plans of other people fell through so SURPRISE we had a party at our house. It kind of was just supposed to be a board game night but copious amounts of alchohol turns things into a PARTY. It was fun. I took photos, Petey and I are stupid drunk people and feel that it's imperative that we get a photographic log of our drinking endevors.

So here in pictures is our impromptu party.



Sober people. Mystical D and The Queen, The Redneck (with a child foot in his hand) and B with K.


Let the Drinking Start!! 1st drink, second and third (or forth...) drink. Petey sharing a beer with ET.


Who's drunker? I'm not sure what is going on in the next photo, I think it's something gay though.


The glow in the dark zombie that landed in my shirt. Petey with Bono-esque glasses on. See!! Bill IS a QUEEN! He looks good in a tiara though.



Mystical D is piling zombies on my cat. I guess she likes it.


Isn't he pretty when he's drunk?


I don't know what the fuck these are pictures of.


Here I am drunk - but I lost my drinking buddy. Oh, there he is.

And the conversation turned to sex toys...


Ummm... I know you've been called a dick head before, but that's now where it goes.

All good things must come to an end... especially when I have to work in the morning! Besides it was 2 am! (actually 1 am with time change crap)

Good Bye Mystical D

Good Bye Drunk Petey

Good Bye Redneck

Good Bye Queen


You don't even want to know... but he was begging for it!

And what would a drunken party be without some pussy.