Proof That Santa Hates Jews
Monday night after working that day and celebrating the tree holiday with K’s family and seeing a movie with La Seg I was struck down in my prime! STRUCK DOWN I TELL YOU! Within 10 or 15 minutes of returning home at I began tossing my cookies (actually fudge, I didn’t eat the cookies) and continued to hurl well beyond the cookies and turkey and frosted mini wheats I had for breakfast. I continued this fun adventure in ralphing (teehee… I have an Uncle Ralph) for 16 freaking hours! I only wish that was an exaggeration. At one point I was sipping water prior to the act so that I could avoid chundering any vital organs.
Morning happened and I called K on his cell phone (yes, yes we live in the same casa, he just couldn’t hear my sad little whimper upstairs) and suggested he call my sister to take the Tiny Terrorists and call my boss to call me in dead for the day. He called D but refused to call my boss as she bitched him out when I had a migraine. D fetched the Little People shortly after K left for work and as luck would have it she was here when my boss called to let it be known that she was pissed yet again at me for being too sick to work. I let D handle the call – no one can out do her in the BITCHY department. Then they left. The rest of the day was a blur of misery.
The next day I managed to keep down half a cup of broccoli cheese soup and some ice tea! Today I’m not cringing when I cough nor do I curl into the fetal position after a sneeze. And honestly, WTF? WHY are my SHOULDERS SORE??? I don’t remember using THEM while shouting groceries.
And, whatever, that’s it. I’m tired now. I’ll write more later.