Saturday, March 29, 2008

All That Glitters...

Is probably some kind of Disney Princess monstrosity.

This is the Disney Princess monstrosity I created today. My offspring LOVED it. 

This cake got the second best reaction EVAH! This is a Star Wars Revenge of the Sith theme. The grandfather came to pick up the cake with the birthday boy's older brother. I showed gramps and brother the cake and the brother who was maybe 8 years old, he let out a loud gasp and nearly dropped the ball he was holding. I started laughing as did grandpa and brother said it was great. Have to thank my sweetie Stewart for the idea. Honestly I had no idea what to do since I've never seen the movie.
This is a lovely variation on my favorite baby shower cake. I like it so much I'm going to have the photo in my book changed to this. 


And this, a cat in rain boots and a tutu. A special request from the grandmother. 

Moving on...

Today at lunch I came home to my computer having blown it's power supply AGAIN. Damn. This is the third. In a couple of days it'll be headed back to the manufacturer to be fixed and hopefully it'll be back with me quickly. Thank goodness for warranties. Still, I'm irritated. And I'm quite certain that K is none to happy about sharing his computer... AGAIN. *sigh* oh well. 

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Morning of HELL

No honestly it really was. If it didn't sound so damn awkward I could totally see Leonidas screaming to the Spartans that this morning they'd break fast in HELL. But then two little girls really don't SEEM all the menacing. Not until you spend EVERY SINGLE moment from the time you wake them until they grudgingly walk out the door to catch the school buss arguing with them. About EVERYTHING. Absolutely EVERYTHING. No really, EVERYTHING. First, for being woken up, second because they AREN'T sick and I refuse to believe they are, third because I have the audacity to expect them to eat breakfast, get a shower, brush teeth, get dressed, find their own clothes, wear the clothes I chose for them, get their stuff together... you get the picture... EVERYTHING. I actually told them I was thrilled they were going to school today so that I wouldn't have to spend ALL DAY LONG with them bitching at me. And I meant it. Luckily they were in a better mood by the time they returned home, they were no longer interested in arguing with me but were back to normal arguing with each other. Oh the joy.

Moving on to CAKE! I know you love the CAKE!

Showing a little love for my favorite firemen (which is just about ANY of them).
Ah this one. A little bribe for a little girl who just got a new baby brother/sister (not sure). Obviously the parents believe that by giving this little lady a pretty cake she will accept the interloper and accept him as one of the family instead of the usurper that he is. And by the time she DOES realize that the baby she thought that was so CUTE at the hospital is actually screamy and smelly and an attention stealer who WON'T GO AWAY no matter how many times she secretly wishes he/she would burst into flames and her world would go back to the perfect princess palace it used to be, filled with unicorns and puppies and pink kittens. And when she DOES ask her parents in a pleading ever so slightly whining voice to 'TAKE IT BACK TO THE HOSPITAL NOW!' her parents will remind her that they got her a pretty cake for being a 'big sister' now and that the noisy, sticky, smelly usurper is there forever to ruin her life. Or something like that... Well...That's how D explained my arrival into her life to me...
And the cake for the baby. Which is not exactly safe to feed to a baby, especially a newborn. But whatever, it's not my place to dictate to people who to feed CAKE to. My actual thought is that it's not really for the baby, as it's rather impractical, but for the mother who after giving birth really needs CAKE. I'm hoping that this isn't some lame sloppy attempt at a push gift from the baby daddy. I mean honestly, a $4 cake? LAME. Not that I'd know, I didn't get a push gift and come on, I gave birth to two kids for a gay man, I totally deserved a push gift. Eh whatever.

Off to bed now. Enjoy the CAKE! Remember... contact me if you are local and NEED Girl Scout cookies... you know you NEED them.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Field Trip Day!

My oldest took a this photo of me before we left for her Girl Scout meeting. I kind of look like Cousin It.
Cabbage Patch saw this duck on the lake and yelled "Mom! Mom! It's that duck from the commerical! Aflak!"
Ahhh my field of flowers to run through. Well that's what I always tell the offspring that's what I'll do when they are gone for the day.
Bluebonnets.
Buttercup.
Violets.
Daisies.
ME in the school cafeteria. I got to be the door person as the door would lock everyone out otherwise. Oh well, I had already taken many photos of flowers.

And speaking of GIRL SCOUT COOKIES *ahem* not that we actually were, BUT I just wanted to let all you locals know that Super Girl's troop will have 3 more cookie booths. So if you haven't ordered cookies or you need MORE cookies, let me know - I'll let you know where they'll be selling or you can just order through me.

Okay I'm off to bed now - got that work thing to do in the morning.
I See Therapy In Her Future

Conversation with Super Girl:

Super Girl: Mom, we got out crawfish in today in class.
Me: Were they tasty?
Super Girl: NO! MOM!
Me: They weren't cooked right?
Super Girl: MOM!! They are our class pets!
Me: Crawfish are food not pets.
CAKE is YUMMY!

funny graphs
see more funny graphs

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Rude Awakening

Goodness in all my bitching about other things I forgot to bitch about being awakened at 12:13 am and then at 12:19 am and yet again at 12:24 am. The first was someone asking for someone who doesn't own this phone and I told them they had a WRONG number. The guy apologized and hung up. The next call was from someone asking if I had just called the police as they (the po-po I'm assuming) had just received a call from that number. I sleepily explained that I had not and had in fact just received a call for someone and blah, blah, blah. I wasn't very coherent, I do remember him laughing before hanging up. The third call was from the original offender phone number asking for that same person again (which for the life of me I can not remember that name). I wonder if I should call them at like 6 am and ask them if I'm there. I figure they probably wouldn't mind me interupting their sleep.
Tiresome Tuesday

Goodness, I'm thrilled that today is pretty much over (I plan to veg on the couch for the remainder of March 25th, 2008 - at least I'll TRY to do that).

Today started with me waking at 5 am from the extended effects of being lactose intolerant (aren't you sick of hearing about me whine about my dairy problems? I bet you think I'm milking it or something). I stuffed some medication down my gullet and headed back to bed for another hour and a half. Fast forward to me walking to work, in the wind and remembering that I didn't take any allergy medicine this morning as my eyes were watering and stinging. And then there was the coughing and sneezing. Ahhh what fun!

But enough with my whining I know you just want CAKE! I've deprived you of CAKE far too long, for that I'm sorry dear readers.

This is a cake for a wedding and it's butt ugly. What horrid colors to put together. The top border is actually a peach color.
This WAS my favorite cake today... until I did the next one.
How could you not love a t-bone steak cake! Why a steak? Because the assistant manager of the meat market just got a promotion and is now the meat market manager in another store. But honestly, who wouldn't love a cake with a giant STEAK on it? My only question is whether you grill it or serve it with ice cream.
This Made Me LOL!!

funnyƂ graphs
see more funny graphs

Monday, March 24, 2008

Sneaky Evil Dairy!

Yesterday I made a most fabulous pot roast in a tasty mushroom gravy. I'm a Southern Girl, I loves me some gravy. I don't eat it often but damn I could eat it just about every day. Because I don't eat it often I forget that it usually has MILK in it. And that the instant (I love instant gravy) usually has lots of 'milk solids' in it. Last night I didn't sleep well, all today I wondered why I was so tired and felt kind of icky and sort of like I'd had some diary products. This evening it dawned on me "Oh hey, milk solids in the GRAVY stupid." Fuck, it's like a truly CRUEL joke since I have a deep affection for all things dairy. KARMA Why doth thou hate me so????

Okay enough bitching.

It's time for photos of CAKE! But since I didn't make anything fabulous today, it's photos of CAT! Woohoo! Which is almost as good as a CAKE but not edible or anything.

Here's Sunshine being attacked by a dino. A VERY VERY small dino.
And here she is after having decimated said dino. Notice the look of satisfaction.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Chocolate Bunny Day Fun

After K left to spend the day with his boyfriend and family, I took tasty pot roast out of the fridge and got it ready to cook for dinner. Mmmmm... me loves some dead animal.

*Disclaimer* No actual POT in roast. Not approved for smoking... unless it's in a grill, not a pipe.
Then we did what every other Jewish kid is doing today! We colored eggs! And I just have to say - I LOVE to do this! K only cooked 2 dozen eggs so, we only had that many to do... minus three which we ate.
Here is Super Girl examining the shade of pink her egg has achieved.
Our lovelies. There was NO arguing or bloodshed during the egg coloring. Everyone - even ME took turns. You can see it but several of the eggs are multi colored. I wish I had bought eggs earlier in the week and actually emptied the shells but kept them intact. I would have LOVED to decorate them more. Seems kind of silly to take a great deal of effort with an egg you're just going to make egg salad out of.
After K returned home and we watched a Godzilla movie, I prodded K into hiding eggs for the Tiny Terrorists to find. It was hilarious. The eggs that they kept overlooking were the ones in plain sight. Like on the grill.
Or my personal favorite, hiding behind a lonely blade of grass next to a tree.

It was a lovely day. And ya know what's even BETTER? Spring Break is OVER! The Tiny Terrorists are BACK TO SCHOOL tomorrow! It's been kind of a shitty Spring Break for them what with them being sick for most of it and not being able to do squat. I'm sure they are looking forward to heading back to school.
An Estah Miracle!



K had to run to a store and find sour cream to take to some family thing he's going to with his boyfriend. Apparently he ran into the Estah bunnah and gave him what for in reference to MY not getting a chocolate bunnah. Pictured above is MY Chocolate Estah Bunnah still in the package with Super Girl's unpackaged and still intact next to it. We had to take the photo like that because we all know that as soon as my bunnah claws it's way out of the packaging it'll go directly into my mouth. Anyway, I'm off to enjoy my bunnah. All I can say is, the squeaky wheel gets the chocolate. Now if you'll excuse I have to go rip this package open and devour my bunnah.
Chocolate Bunny Day!

Except... there are no chocolate bunnies here! WHAT? I don't get a chocolate bunny today?!?!?!?! It's because I'm Jewish right? That is so wrong! We Jew's like chocolates too! I don't even care what shape they are. That's fine, that's fine, the Christians can hoard their chocolate bunnies, I know that next month is Passover and we'll just hoard all the matzah! Oh... you don't want any.... well okay, go back to your chocolate bunnies and Easter ham then.

Since I have a lovely day off as the store is closed to allow us 'to worship with our families', I've made MUFFINS! Because who doesn't feel a tad reverent at the sight of a hot fresh plate full of pious blueberry muffins? Can I get an A-MEN?!

Don't dog me about how beat up my pan looks, it was my mothers, which doesn't make it sanctified or anything, it just means it's older than dirt.

And on a more serious note, I wish all of you (who celebrate it) an amazing Easter and that it's more than just baskets of chocolate bunnies and colored eggs, that you do feel the joy and happiness from the gift that your savior gave you. (Don't give me that funny look, I taught Sunday School for 9 years, I know the story.) Happy Easter all of you.