Friday, August 24, 2007

Fucking, Fuckity, Fuck-Fuck!

I am currently hating Time Warner and AT&T, who are both simultaniously fucking me. And I haven't even gotten a kiss or a reach around.

Wednesday I rescheduled my Thursday install of cable internet and phone to Wednesday of next week. Thursday mid-day my telephone was shut off, and today mid-morning my internet was shut off. K (who was home sick) got ahold of AT&T who told him that Time Warner told them to shut it off and they couldnt' turn it back on any sooner than Tuesday of next week. Time Warner said that because I had rescheduled less than 72 hours in advanced, I was fucked - not in those exact words, but close enough. I had a long conversation liberally peppered with profanity with a very nice gentleman at Time Warner who sympathized and even appologized for laughing when I said I was getting fucked and hadn't even got a kiss or a reach around, but he can't do dick. Though IF they get a cancelation, I'm in... or so they say. So... I'm internetless and phoneless... and pissed of.

AND I can't post this over on my MySpace blog because I can't get loged on. Fuckity, fuck fuck!

Oh... I had a really good day - LONG! Had lunch with an old friend from WAY BACK and it was AWESOME!

Thursday, August 23, 2007

CAKES! CAKES! CAKES!

Because I know you want to see this!


I know Sable loves this one...


Ahhh the finishing touches to make it PERFECT. Don't you think so Sable?


This I just like because it's sooo damn pretty!


My personal favorite. I did this today on a whim! I love pretty fishies!

I appologize that the photos aren't fabulous, but I took them with my camera phone.

So Freaking Tired

I’m so freaking tired. I already said that, but I’m so tired saying it twice just makes sense… or three times now. And ya know what? I feel a tad bit guilty saying that I’m TIRED after working all day… decorating cakes! I have this AMAZING job that I LOVE and it just seems insane that I’d be tired after decorating cakes all day and for that, I’m feeling a bit guilty. But… fuck that noise, I’m tired and tomorrow will be just like today… except not… since it’ll be Friday and Friday’s are busier than Thursdays… whatever.. I work every day until Monday. It’s a good thing I LOVE my job!

Will Wonders Ever Cease?

Tonight was meet the teacher night at the Tiny Terrorists school. Due to the fact that the school NEVER sent their reports cards home, I had no idea what grade they would be in. I was completely convinced that Cabbage Patch had failed Kindergarten and was fairly convinced that Super Girl had failed 2nd grade due to her issues with testing. I was pleasantly surprised to discover that Super Girl is now a 3rd grader and totally fucking shocked to learn that Cabbage Patch is a 1st grader! Holy Social Promotions Bat Man! My offspring passed! And I’m thrilled. My kids are ALMOST BACK IN SCHOOL! YAY! The endless litany of “I’m bored.” Is nearly OVER. Happy Dance! Happy Dance! I’m so damn proud of my girls.

Sweet Dreams

This week the senior cake decorator is on VACATION - something of which I have no idea what it is except that it requires them to be GONE and me to work every day until they return. It's cool, I love my job. The only thing is that I DREAM of decorating cakes (and raping Bruce Willis... and the hot gaming geek I call Bruce Willis... together sometimes... but I digress!). Cake dreams rock (and dreams of eating cake of HOT men rock even more), life is sweet. ;)

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Destined To Be Vegetarian?

Tonight we went to a steak restaurant for K’s much anticipated return from Cali. Being a steak restaurant in TEXAS the walls were heavily adorned with tastefully done dead things. It was a taxidermist dream. At some point during the dinner, Super Girl started identifying some of the animals (calling a buffalo a moose) and some point, one of the Tiny Terrorists asked if the animals were real. I, being the ever-educational mother said yes. At that point, Super Girl said she was scared by all the dead critters on the walls. I, being ever so compassionate, rolled my eyes and told her to get over it they were dead. Then came the questions of how the dead animals were on the wall and a brief discussion of taxidermy. Super Girl seemed satisfied and stopped feigning fear. Cabbage Patch on the other had was FULL of questions; she wanted to know HOW the animals got dead. I told her that most of them had been hunted and killed – except the cat, that was probably hit by a car and the raccoon, some redneck probably shot that because it was in his garbage. Then she wanted to know WHY anyone would HUNT. I told her because animals are tasty. She was OUTRAGED. HUNTING is BAD. Uh-oh, she’s WAY too young to get a PETA membership. I then informed her that if she was going to become a vegetarian, she need to start actually EATING vegetables. I then listed off several veggies and asked her if she liked them – maybe 4 out of 12 and I know she was lying about liking broccoli. Then I asked her if she liked hot dogs, sausage, steak, chicken nuggets, etc. and she answered yes to all of it. Yeah, I just don’t see her giving up tasty animals any time soon.

Things That Make Me Happy

My birthday makes me really happy. Just because. I love having a day all to myself. (I refuse to acknowledge anyone else’s birthday that falls on my day unless they happen to be a wee child and that just makes me happy they chose to be born on such a great day – yes I know I’m vain.) What else makes me happy – birthday parties for me that are shared with my best friends bachlorette party. Oh hey, I think I’ll just make a list for you! I know that’s what you really want (or not, but that’s what you are getting!).

1. Already listed – read the paragraph above.

2. Again, I said that already.

3. Birthday cards that make me laugh.

4. My fabulous friends wishing me a happy day.

5. My sister making to my b-day party (finally).

6. Heading to the gay bar for dancing and drag show.

7. Wearing a feather boa.

8. Being a fag magnet and having the gay men talk to me about my hair.

9. Dancing with random gay men.

10. Unintentionally looking like a short chubby drag queen because I’m wearing a boa, crazy false eyelashes and dancing at a gay bar with random gay men.

11. Being told I’m too pretty to be single (Bwhahahahahaha! As if! Their seeing eye dog must have told them that.)

12. Talking to Bruce Willis for 30 minutes Sunday night. You sexy devil!

13. Two new gerbils (Captain Jack and Captain Wil).

14. A new cell phone! Gracis D!

15. School starting next week!

16. Talking to Bruce Willis for 30 minutes Sunday night. Did I mention that already? Well it made me REALLY happy.

17. Finding an old friends e-mail by chance through the gay ex.

18. Having D solve my problem with a very simple and quick fix.

19. Being wrong about something.

20. Talking to Bruce Willis for 30 minutes Sunday night. I know I already mentioned it, but he’s a sexy mutha!

Also… K is back from his trip to Cali. YAY! He made a side trip with his man to Vegas and being the UBER GEEK that he is, he has to go to Star Trek the Experience. Being thoughtful, he bought me PRESSIES!! Being ever so slightly geeky myself – I LOVE MY TRIBBLE! He also got the Tiny Terrorists’ some way too cute Vulcan teddy bears. I’ll post photos of them in the next post.

Anyway, I’m happy today.