Thursday, April 15, 2004

Tax Day

April 15th. I got my taxes done and submitted yesterday. Yay.

My mother had a cat who was born on April 15. Her name was Crystal and she was solid gray. She was also EVIL incarnate. Meanness personified. A spiteful, horrible little cat. My mother loved her. She was probably the most uncuddly cat I've ever encountered. I don't know what happened. I got the cat for her. K picked up the cat (the specific cat mother wanted - had to be solid gray or nothing else), we kept the cat (much to the dissatisfaction of my cat Sinnamon - who herself was a demon but a cuddly demon to me) for a couple of days, she was sweet. Maybe it was just because she was born on April 15th.

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

Blue Jell-O Is Satan's Handy Work

If I haven’t mentioned before, let it be known at this moment that K is truly insane. I suspected as much before we married and he is very good at seeming quite sane for the most part, only occasionally does his insanity rear its head. This past Monday is when his most recent bout of insanity hit.

K promised the little people over the weekend that they could make Jell-O eggs. We have 3 or 4 Jell-O egg molds that have been collected over the years (collected but seldom used). Monday evening when he returned from his slave laboring he was bearing a bag full of colorful Jell-O powder. Yay. Red, green and blue. While I did my slave labor for the evening he and the little people prepared the concoction for the Jell-O eggs and had them chilling in the fridge by the time I returned. Tuesday morning the little people woke from their Jell-O egg dreams begging for a breakfast of them. I relented to their request as I really didn’t want to cook. I prepared a place for the little people to consume their unnatural food and gave them each a bowl with two Jell-O eggs which were quickly consumed. Thinking that the mess was fairly easily contained I let them have more eggs – which this time I allowed Super Girl to get from the fridge (my first and second mistake). The little people did not eat much of the second round of Jell-O eggs. The eggs became a non ending source of entertainment for them. At the point that the eggs began to fall onto my (badly in need of a steam cleaning) carpet I put an end to the ‘fun’. Unfortunately for me having let the kids serve themselves to the eggs that one time, they now had the erroneous notion that it they now had permission to get Jell-O eggs for themselves whenever they desired them. Grrr… I spent a great deal of time picking up half eaten eggs yesterday. By the time K got home yesterday evening all but a few of the Jell-O eggs had been consumed/destroyed/disposed of… or so I thought.

This morning I gave the little people a nutritious and delicious breakfast of Cheerios. The Jell-o eggs were now just an unpleasant memory. I started cleaning. About 9:30 am I noticed a blue blob on the carpet and with a bit of disgust I picked it up. Then I saw it… a trail of blue spots leading to a massacred Jell-O egg. I thought…uh… maybe I shouldn’t share exactly what I thought but it had something to do with the fact that I thought I was free of the damn eggs and how I desired to commit grave bodily harm against K for even buying Jell-O let alone BLUE! I spent 20 minutes scrubbing blue spots off my carpet cursing people. Jell-O – especially BLUE – has now joined the list of BANNED foods in my house. It is EVIL and insidious and makes nasty marks on the carpets (and children for that matter) and is deceptive (you think it’s solid and will be easy to clean up if dropped on something, yet it’s just waiting to touch something and dissolve into a horribly staining liquid made by Satan himself).

Tuesday, April 13, 2004

Color Me Unmotivated

I have sinus pressure. I'm tired. I did carb load. mmmmm... carbs... Bread... Italian food. Life is good.

This was stolen from another blog... To lazy to link to where it is though... Sorry... I suck (that's why I'm popular!)

Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says:
Or perhaps you'd prefer a mizrach featuring fluffy kitties, gambling in the Old City. (directions on how to make a black velvet painted mizrach from 'Judaikitsch'

Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?
Glass of water

What is the last thing you watched on TV?

With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
The hum of my fridge and the crinkling of pattern paper being cut out by my husband

When did you last step outside?
about an hour ago when I got out of the car to come inside

Before you came to this website, what did you look at?
My e-mail (internet porn)

What are you wearing?
hmmm... Aren't you cheeky... ;o) ecru crocheted short sleeved sweater and maroon shorts

Did you dream last night?
Yes I dream just about every night

When did you last laugh?
about 20 minutes ago, Super Girl was telling her grandfather something was boring.

What is on the walls of the room you are in?
I'm between rooms... Cows on one wall, pictures of the little people on the other

Seen anything weird lately?
What kind of question is that? I have kids, I see weird shit daily.

What do you think of this quiz?
It's filling up the page

What is the last movie you saw?
The Secret Window

If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?
A house... No, liposuction... No, no a house... No... lipo... No... I'd be signing the papers while getting lipo.

Tell me something about you that I don't know:
I once went for 6 months with out shaving my legs (gay men don't seem to mind manly hairy legs)

If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I would clean up the pollution.

Do you like to dance?
Yeah baby! Didn't you see me burning up the dance floor?

George Bush is he a power-crazy nut case or some one who is finally doing something that has needed to be done for years?:
He is actually neither. All I will say is that our troops need to come home. I don't discuss politics with anyone other than K.

Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Wow... I can Soooo imagine that since my oldest is a girl!... But I don't put the little people's names online so I'm not going to say. She is named after a Disney Princess though.

Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
William and we'd call him Wil

Would you ever consider living abroad?
Eh, what the hell. I can be slutty just about anywhere.
The Feast Of Unleavened Bread!

Passover ends tonight at sundown. I'm excited. I may eat an entire loaf of French bread by myself. I know the little people have gotten tired of matzo as well. But come on, you would too if you ate unsalted, Kosher for Passover Matzo every day. But I exaggerate. It's not that bad. There are lots of creative recipes to make. The little people loved the Passover Pancakes - they tasted just like regular pancakes just a bit thinner. The Apple Carrot Matzo muffins were a great hit. As I type I am feasting on a nice hot bowl of matzo ball soup (my favorite). I'm ready for bread though. Bread and some pasta. mmmmm... I think I'll be on a serious carb overload tonight.
Thats A Lot Of Pussy!

Big Pussy.
Dorky Moments Brought To You By Judy

I've had this car for almost a year. It is a nice car. Has a CD player in it and I've never ever played it. So Sunday right before I head out to Scarby I grab a few CD's for the trip. I listen to NIN then think about changing to Lenny Kravits. Well I want to anyway. I can't figure out how to get the freaking CD out of the player! I'm driving along pushing buttons at random. I finally give up. On the way home, I can't figure it either, but I'm tired and it's raining. Tonight I go into work for a brief (waste of) time. I get into my car and look at the dash where the stereo buttons and knobs are. I push a few things then I notice a lone button up at the top right. Right near the CD slot. I push it. Nothing happens (most of the other buttons make SOMETHING happen), so I push it again, hold it down. The CD gently slides out of the CD player. DOH!

Other Dorky thing

Driving home from Scarby was a bitch. The rain was bad in places and the traffic was heavy off and on. I'm very bad with directions (ask anyone) and I get lost if I do not have explicitly written directions from my door to where I need to end up. I did have directions to Scarby (I made Kent write them down for me after he handed me the map that is available on their web site and said "Here you go, you know how to get to I35 right?" and I gave him a wide eyed panicked look that said "Are you out of your fucking mind? I'm lucky I can get to my work every week without getting lost!!!") and followed them to the letter to get there - they were very simple also. So on the way back, it's dark, there's traffic and it's raining. I'm driving and I start thinking "Shouldn't I have already come to 635?" shortly after that I see a sign for 75 and think "What? How did I miss 635???" (actually I'm not to broke up about that since 635 can be a real bitch to drive on at times) at that point I realized that I had in fact missed 635 (like a dork) but the powers that be had seen fit to make sure I got back to 75 and headed back home. So... I ended up leaving the parking lot at 7:30 pm and getting home just after 9 pm!!! (part of it was the weather and traffic, the rest of the delay was just me being lost and not knowing it.)

Monday, April 12, 2004

Internet Back UP!

My internet has been down since 4:30pm today! DAAAAAAMMMMMNNN!

Sunday, April 11, 2004

Good Day Sunshine!

She has returned! I'll write more about the Prodigal Cat later, but just know, she is BACK! Sunshine is home. I'm happy.