My New Hobby
A couple of months ago I found a bag of yarn and stuff in my craft box. It was a bag of stuff that was my mother's. There were a couple of sets of knitting needles in the bag and a half finished project. I wondered to myself if I would enjoy that.... well truthfully I wondered if I could do that... So grabbed a set of needles and some yarn and started knitting. And I was surprised, I actually enjoyed it... and it was pretty easy. So I made a small baby afghan for a friend and I just made a cute little winter hat for one of my kids. Damn I'm proud of that.. it's the first actual knitting I've done from a pattern. Anyway.. I know I'm just a geek. (ummm... that's not actually a picture of one of my children wearing the hat... )

British Comedies Rock!
The one biggest thing I miss by not having cable.. and therefore having absolutely no television reception.. is watching British Comedies on Saturday and Sunday night. One of my absolute favorites is Black Adder. This week I have been watching a friends cat... actually just stopping by occasionally to check to see if the cat is all right... anyway, when we stopped by Thursday morning, I spied that this friend had the collection of Black Adder on DVD... so I snagged it.... have to return it to his home before he returns tomorrow... I know... I'm bad.. I should have asked... bad Judy! Bad Judy! But I've been laughing my ass off. We've gotten through 3 of the 5 DVD's, two more to watch then off to sneak the collection back to his house.... he'll never know... I mean is it stealing if you plan to return it?...

Surprisingly Good...
Have you ever sat down to watch a movie and didn't expect it to be any good? I do sometimes.. which makes one question why I sat down at all to watch said movie... but ... that's another story... Anyway... I borrowed Sense and Sensibility from the library. And I have to say, I really enjoyed it. I generally don't enjoy movies like that at all. I tend to steer clear of 'chick flicks' in favor of monster movies, horror movies and action comedies... Yeah I know.. not typical girl movies. I'm always shocked and surprised when I do like a 'chick flick'. Anyway, I really did enjoy the movie, the acting was magnificent. Although I don't recall any of the gothic romance novels (I was forced to read in high school) ever having a happy ending... OOPS.. hope I didn't ruin the ending for anyone interested in watching this movie... hehehehe....

Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas....

Well actually it already looks like Christmas... and has since about 30 seconds after Halloween.... In the past couple of weeks I have noticed the huge tents being put up in front of grocery stores and in vacant areas... Yes, yes, the tents of the great nomadic Christmas Tree tribes. Over the next weeks more and more of these communities will spring up. Great hoards of evergreen trees... branches all prickly and piney scented... Here for just one purpose... to sell the lessor of their kind as slaves and sacrifices! Yes! They are slave traders! Yes they offer sacrifices! They are a despicable clan... Even going so far as to have those who anger the elders punished publicly! Public Flocking! It's horrid. I can't even drive past one of their great tents without cringing. I refuse to support such heinous and cruel activities and have not bought a Christmas tree. I refuse to make an innocent tree suffer and die for my enjoyment... Only an artificial tree (to be tortured by the cats) for this house... I urge you to turn away from the slave trading clans of Christmas Tree traders this season... don't buy a tree! End the needless suffering! Of course... if your Jewish... your already doing your part ;o). (disclaimer... no actual Christmas Trees were harmed in this article...)

Well, it's past Thanksgiving and I've finally found a few moments to make it back to the computer. Have you missed me? ;o) I'll take that as a yes. I've been horribly busy since Wednesday before Thanksgiving until just NOW. I've been feeling that my life has gone into hyper drive and I'm just along for the ride... I really hate that feeling... maybe after next week it will slow down... Next week will be horribly busy and crazy... and stressful... but enough about that...

Ahhhh a Turkey Stupor....

Nothing says Thanksgiving like overeating and falling into a turkey stupor... This year I made the turkey... and it was fabulous if I do say so myself. Everyone kept saying how good it was and how juicy it was (*note the past holiday turkeys served in this family have been something akin to turkey shaped cardboard)... so the turkey was devoured. But alas, my pumpkin pies were utter crap. I used a new recipe and they were just barely edible. *sigh* good thing father in law brought cheese cake and cake for dessert. I was denied my turkey stupor though. We were at the in-laws house and sat around watching DVD's and talking, but no one napped. Damn it! I love my turkey stupor! We collected our dishes and left overs and headed home about 11:30 PM. I had to work on Friday but as soon as I got home I had some of the left over turkey and took a nap... but it was not the same... It was a pale imitation. *sigh* Anyway.. much to my surprise we only had enough left over turkey for lunch yesterday! Damn... I made a good turkey.

Uggh.. Today was a much better day... don't fret about me, I was just haveing a moment...

Just finished making 1 loaf of banana bread, 3 loaves of pumpkin bread and 2 pumpkin pies. Ahhh I love cooking for the holidays... I'll write more tomorrow... must sleep now.. have much to do tomorrow...

*sigh* There's so much going on right now in my life... this post is going to be a bit of a downer... I generally don't do that here, I try to keep it light... but I am going to talk about this... (vaguely... but I'm talking)...

The past months have been so confusing for me. Painful, lonely, bitter, sad, anxious but mostly confusing. I'm finally to a point where I have been feeling like this was close to an end... finally... but in the past couple of days, I've started thinking that the road is just getting longer for us. I don't like that... this situation needs to come to an end... my punishment has to come to an end. And now someone else has been drug into this situation... well actually she jumped into it even though I begged her not to. And now she's feeling the same cruel punishment that I have been. I didn't want that for her. I was so afraid that would happen... I was afraid that it would prolong my punishment mostly... but I was very afraid for her. Now she's been judged and examined, questioned and abused in the same manner I have been. Part of me is thankful, now she knows a bit of what I have been dealing with, but a large part of me is sad that she has been hurt so much. Crushed. Rejected. Beaten. Hurt. Her heart is so broken by what's happened in the past couple of days. Damn, she's so sensitive. I want to make it better for her, make her hurting stop. But I can't... I can't even stop it for myself. I'm angry that she got treated the way she did, that a few words have destroyed her chances at something she desires so much, that there is no way to stop what's already been set in motion... that any of this has happend at all. It's so frustrating... I wish I could only think of myself, of my hurt and anguish, but I can't... I'm not like that... I feel worse that she's being hurt by this situation than I do about my own pain and frustation. I've taken much of the responsibility for what I've gone through... right or wrong, I just have... I can't do that for her... Damn I can't change things. I've lost so much in all this... She's lost the possibility for so much... My heart is breaking because of that.... God willing, Thanksgiving will bring something for both of us to be thankful for.

Whew... been a busy day. Haven't had much time to post here... so sorry... so sorry... I know I have let down my adoring public (*self delusion in progress*). I only have a little bit of time so I'll tell about some funny things...

I was talking on the phone to a friend of mine - we were having a fairly serious conversation, I said "You need to come over soon." The reply "Oh I'm afraid to come to your place, what with all that wildlife around - I might get rabies." smart ass...

OK, my geek gaming activities kept me up very late on Saturday night/Sunday Morning, so I didn't get a lot of time to sleep before having to get up and go to work, when I got home I went to take a much needed nap. About 3:20 pm I wake up (hadn't been napping long..) and I look at the clock, notice it's still light outside and think "3:20? In the morning? Nooo... there is too much light outside.. Must be 8am or so, my clock must be wrong." So I pick up my watch and look at the time, it matches the bedside clock so now I think "hmmm.. I wonder how my watch got reset also." So I decide I need to look at the clock in the kitchen, because it's got to be sometime Monday morning. I walk out of the bedroom, into the livingroom then it occurs to me that it's 3:20 pm... it's still Sunday afternoon... doh! I figured I needed more sleep at that time and headed back to bed.

Monday... time for the Monday Mission thanks to PromoGuy...

1. Have you ever made a wish that came true?
Yeah... I wished for a kitty and I got my precious Sinnamon... right before a rain storm... lots of lightening and thunder... then the mewing of a cute little kitty... *sigh* I loved that cat...

2. How about any wishes that you are happy never came true?
Yeah, later I wished for another kitty, and I never got it, which was a good thing because Sinnamon hated other cats and would have killed them.. it was a moment of insanity that made me want another kitty.

3. Do you like who you are? Are you the person you hoped you would become?
I like me a lot. If I wasn't me but I knew me, I'd be best friends with me. No I'm not the person I'd hoped to be, I'm much different and a much better person that I could have ever hoped to be... Still plenty of room for improvement, but better than I had ever expected.

4. I recently found some job applications that I never turned in. Back in 1986 I intended to apply at "County Seat" and "Chess King" but got an offer from Penny's (where I worked all through college). It was a good thing, since only one of the three is still around. Have you ever applied for positions, or had any interviews, where you later are glad you never got the job?
Oh yeah.... I once interviewed for a job as an administrative assistant for a director who I thought was pretty cool, didn't get it though... months later this director got fired for inappropriate business activities.... that would have been a mest to clean up.

5. While on the topic of career opportunities, what was your very first "real" job? What job was the most embarrassing?
Working as a file clerk in an insurance office. Most embarrassing.... hmmm... I really haven't had any jobs that were embarrassing...

6. Speaking of news, have you had your 15 minutes of fame yet? Such as being in the newspaper, on television, linked on a high-profile site or otherwise caught in the spotlight of the media?
Unfortunately I have... when my apartment fire happened, that made the news... with me crying in front of my apartments... sheesh... when I had my youngest baby, breech at home, assisted by the paramedics... that fireman/paramedic got a citation from the city and wanted me there for pictures which made the local paper.

7. In the USA, many of us will celebrate Thanksgiving this week. Do you celebrate Thanksgiving (or something like it)? Do you enjoy getting together will your extended family for these types of celebrations?
I love cooking the big meal.

BONUS: Where is the tenderness?
Do you need a hug?