Saturday, July 15, 2006

Best Sign Of The Day

Taped to a computer in the nurse station:

Not Working, "Mad Cow Disease"!!
A Perfect Hair Day

Sadly I must waste it on WORK!
Horoscope for: Saturday, July 15, 2006

You might not be as outgoing today as you usually are, but this is not a cause for worry or alarm. You have made it through a powerful wave of emotions and now it's time to integrate your feelings rather than distracting yourself with something else. Let others know that there is nothing wrong and that they don't need to do anything to make you happier. You may just need a little time to yourself.


Or maybe my cell phone is just off right now... *sigh* Don't try to call me on my cell, it's pointless as I'll won't get the call. Call my house phone or send me an e-mail. *pout*

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Sleep Interrupted

Last night the fire alarms in the building started going off for no damn reason. At 1:45 am. And they kept going off until about 2:30 am. Luckily I was awake because it was really LOUD in all the bedrooms and probably would have made me either have a heart attack or wet my bed, neither of which would have been good.

When the alarms were quieted and the Little People sent back to bed, K went outside because he thought there was a fire truck here and he’s hot for fire fighters. After he came back inside I asked if in fact there WERE fire fighters outside and he said yes, so I had to go out – what? Fire fighters are HOT.

I walk to the end of the sidewalk and look at the fire truck with HOT men sitting on it and one of them starts walking towards me. I’m thinking “Shit! I look totally white trash and here he comes!” He starts asking me questions about if I know where the maintenance man lives because they shut down the alarm but he needs to come reset it, yadda, yadda, yadda. In the course of the conversation I ask him if he knows the fire fighter who delivered Cabbage Patch and he said yes, then I (like the dork I am) say “He delivered my little girl.” And he says “Yeah, I know, I was there. I thought you looked familiar.” I’m all “Oh shit! Yes you are! I remember you! You were the one who put the placenta in the Blockbuster bag. Yeah I look different with clothes on and all. Yadda, yadda, yadda…” Now before I continue any further, let me clarify things: 5 years ago I went into labor at home, it was unexpectedly QUICK and the baby was breach with feet presenting first, necessitating a call to 911 which brought the entire manpower of station 3 to my house and in my kitchen to witness one fire fighter deliver and revive my youngest child. Because I work at the hospital near by and I’ve been unlucky enough to have two wrecks locally in the past 5 years, I’ve run into various fire fighters who were standing around in my kitchen that night. Invariably I ALWAYS look schlumpy or otherwise crappy when this happens! I mean it’s hard to look much worse than a naked walrus giving birth on a living room floor, though bleeding from a cut above my eye after totaling my car was a close second. But I digress, I told him that her birthday is TODAY (Happy Birthday Cabbage Patch!) and he was all impressed. He told me that all those fire fighters who had been standing in my kitchen were still at the same station and yadda, yadda, yadda.

I finally got to bed and good lord the wee people were up at 8 am ready for a birthday party! But that’s another story. ;)
Random Photos

Some random shots from my insane life... I'll ad more throughout the day.



Wednesday, July 12, 2006


Brother 2
My Stupid Photos and Workin' it

Sunday D came over to pick up the dogs and we got into a conversation over goofy MySpace photos of someone me know so we had to take some goofy ass photos and get all the 'angles'. Here are some that weren't to marred by our laughter. I'll be posting some of this stupid shit on the profile, don't worry.


Goofy Me

So Tired...

Yes, yes, I know we are stupid... you should see the photos that I WON'T post!

Moving on... I started working out again. It's about damn time - It's been over a year since I worked out reguarly. I'm sore today, but what the hell I feel better and hopefully my ass will get smaller. ;)

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Things People Say...

A random sampling of things that have been said to me or by me recently:

Him: You know who I bet gives a good blow job?
Her (eye brows raised): Oh, do tell.
Him: Judy. I bet she gives a damn good blow job.
Her (giggling): Wouldn't know.
Him: Yeah, she probably does. Damn I'm drunk.
(Of course I do though he'll never find out, and yes he was drunk)

"Oh yeah, you think you are funny don't you? Regular Chuckles The Fucking Clown." (actually D and I say this to each other all the time)

"I could really use a militant lesbian trainer."

*sniffle* *sniffle*
"What? I'm not even yelling at you!"
"I know you are gonna!" *sniffle* *sniffle*

"Oh sorry, I was just having an antacid flashback.

"Well what do they have in that store?"
"Well what kind of books?"
"Books... it's a book store... they have all kinds of books."
"Well, maybe we'll just wait out here then."

"Damn it, she must know me and how vain I am."

Them: Someone is asking me on a date tonight. I'm just unsure about taking it.
Me: Is he a serial killer?
Them: He's a Rennie, so yes.

"Wow! It looks you had a small dog cut off your head. You look good though."

"You don't need a new life. You just got a new job, got a new hair cut and got rid of a bad boyfriend! Everything sounds great now!"
"No, no I think I'd be a squirrel if I was an animal. I'm a little hyper at times and I like to save things. Just think of that crap in my room as a pile of nuts. A big pile of nuts, but whatever. I'd make a really cute squirrel; I've got the hair for it. What? I do. I need more coffee."

"I think I'm getting depressed. I'm kind of on the verge of being depressed. It's either that or I'm extremely bored... or I'm just not drinking enough coffee."

" I'm just nauseated."

"It's okay, ugly, sleazy woman have a way of turning one's stomach."

Her: I would just like to state for the record. I hate dialup
Her: I want to shot the computer right now.
Me: yes dial up is something like purgatory
Me: it's one of the levels of hell for sure
Her: well its free... but the cost is my sanity

Her: ugh, I can feel the grease clogging my arteries
Me: Does it tickle?

Other randomness...

The tube trip is soon and I'm now having doubts about whether I shall go or not. I WANT to go, but I'm thinking I should really be the responsible type parent person and not go since it's a month until school starts (YAY! Summer Vacation is ALMOST over!) and I still have to buy school supplies (ack!) and school clothes for both Chaos and Destruction. A weekend of hanging out with my friends getting drunk and sunburned sounds magical, but I may just have to say now. Gawd, I don't know. Sometimes I hate being a grown up.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Things That Make You Go Hmmmmm...

I just finished taking a photo for a lovely couple... I think they may have been cousins. The father was so country (or kountry) I couldn't believe my eyes. Dad was wearing Dickey's denim cover alls, a plaid shirt, cap with some hunting logo on it and work boots, all he needed was hayseed to complete the look because everything else from the way he talked to the kind of dull look on his face fit the sterotype. He was totally nice, but DAMN Gomer! Don't wear that shit out in public!