How To Rip My Heart Out Of My Chest
And Make Me Feel Unmeasurable Guilt

Wake up this morning coughing, with a fever and all, then disolve into tears because I won't let you go to school. And when your daddy gets back from the store with medicine for you, look at me with big hopeful eyes and say "Now I can go to school?" *sigh*

Note: This only works if you are a wee child. Adults doing this crap just make me homicidal and that causes me to consult literature on how best to dispose of a body.