Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Word Of The Day


re·ti·ar·i·us [ rshee áiree əss ] (plural re·ti·ar·i·i [ rshee áiree  ])


Roman gladiator: an ancient Roman gladiator who fought using a net and a trident

[Mid-17th century.

My use of the word: Dude, that retiarius in the Russell Crowe movie was soooooo hot!

Moving on to the rediculous...

Redi Whip has such a STUPID commercial. Luckily it's short so the bleeding that it causes in my brain is brief.

This month's theme for NaBloPoMo is LETTERS. I tend to do those at times so, what the hell here we go.

Dear Youngest Child of mine,

Cabbage Patch please, please, please, please for the love of dog, SHUT UP. No really, just shut your cake hole. Your CONSTANT running commentary of insanity needs to be silenced from time to time. I'm hoping that this really is just a phase that you will grow out of because when I think of you in your mid thirties walking around just talking to the voices in your head as you shop for groceries I CRINGE. I really don't want you to become that disheveled woman walking down the street wearing a grubby sweater and knit hat while pushing a shopping cart full of kittens and bottled water in the middle of July while discussing the government conspiracies with a stuffed bunny in your pocket.

So, um yeah. Just hush, keep your conversations with the voices in your head to yourself.

Your Mother - no, not the mother ship

Dear Asshole Driving In My Neighborhood;

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Stop giving me dirty looks for having the audacity to WALK across the street at the stop sign, using the cross walk and slowing you down as you rush off to work or shop or buy drugs or pick up your bitches and ho's or whatever. You inching up past the stop sign toward me does not make me cross faster and our subsequent dirty looks just makes me walk slower. So, have a nice day and may your vibrator die before you reach orgasm.

You are an asshat,

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