Thursday, April 17, 2008

Life Sucking Experience

Yeah, that's right. I went to WallyWorld today. I felt the life force of mine ebbing as I entered the store, yet I still continued on. I told myself that I was being overly dramatic and that it would be a waste of precious resources (gas) to not just go to WallyWorld since I was right across the street anyway.

My first clue to leave the store screaming and never returned happened rather quickly and oddly enough did not involve screaming (mine or other people's). I went to the deli counter to get deli meat for lunches. I stood there discussing what meat to get with my oldest Tiny Terrorist for a minute or two when another woman walked up to the counter and the *helpful and attentive WalMartian working the deli asked her if she needed help. I just shrugged it off. How long does it take to slice deli meat anyway? 5 minutes later the meat was STILL being cut and I was still standing there waiting for someone to help me, I looked around and saw another WalMartian in the deli area just puttering around but not waiting on customers. I said 'fuck this.' to myself and walked off to where the sad looking cakes were that my progeny were trying to convince me to buy for them. As I walked away I heard "Ma'am, do you need some help?" from behind me, I stopped and turned, the puttering WalMartian was suddenly attentive, she repeated herself and I said "Well not anymore" and walked away. I had this overwhelming urge to just LEAVE, and I should have but that whole saving gas money kept me there.

My darling offspring were under the mind control rays that are emitted through out WallyWorld and only affect children, I spent the remainder of the trip telling them to be quiet, don't touch that, no you CAN'T have that and fer Christ sake will you please keep up. Somehow I did manage to gather the things needed for our Passover Seder dinner - not all of them mind you, but most of them.

By the time got to the dairy section I was irritable and ready to be gone from there. It was easy for the Tiny Terrorist to talk me into a tasty looking cake from the reduced for quick sale cart. It helped that it was also marked $2.39. Then it was time to head to the check out stand.

Since I had a bottle of cheap Kosher wine I decided to just have a cashier check me out instead of my usual self check out. For once the checker was NICE and seemed happy. When he got to the total it was $126.01. I almost peed my pants. I barely had half a cart of food and the most expensive thing I had put in the cart was a staggering $3.34, so WTF???? I looked in my wallet as I pondered this and told the checker he'd have to take some things of because I just didn't have that much cash in my wallet. So he did, I put all the Passover stuff up there for him to void off and reassured Super Girl that I'd just get it tomorrow. When he was done and a mere 3 sad looking bags were left in my basket, he told me my total was $106.18. What?!? you have got to be kidding was my response. He too was surprised and checked the ticket and found a charge for $82.39. A bakery item for $82.39. He called a manager who took off the charge and then put it back on and took it off and trotted off to the bakery to check on something and tried to figure out why it was ringing up at $82.39 instead of $2.39 (hmmmm maybe it was MISS ENTERED?). And then it was put back on... and removed. And YET another manager was summoned meaning that the collective IQ of the group had dropped dramaticlly at this point. More talking, more doubting the checker by the manager who kept reentering the same number and getting the SAME result. In the end the cake was entered 5 times at $82.39 and once at $2.39.

This is when I turned into a bitch. The first manager told me my total was $48.25. I then said to her "Shouldn't I get that cake for free since it rang up wrong? I work at a grocery store and if anything we sell rings up wrong the customer gets it free." That manager gave me a dirty look and called yet another manager and told her "She works at a grocery store and said she should get this for free since it rang up wrong." If they had given me any shit at that point I would have told them to have fun putting my shit back on the shelves and walked out of the store - I had been standing at this damn counter for 20 minutes while the idiot managers ignored the only intelligent person involved - the checker. This new manager never even made eye contact, just frowned a lot and took off the charge.

So that was it, I left the store with but a shred of my will to live intact. All that WallyWorld BS on top of dealing with my rather expensive ticket and K getting a horrible migraine at lunch with me - eh, go figure, I give my ex migraines... wonder if I should stop smacking around that voodoo doll of him. Not the best day if I do say so myself.

Now I'm off to bed having accomplished very little of what I'd planned for my day off.


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