Why Cats? Why?

WHY does a cat HAVE to get on the clean, fresh from the dryer laundry right after I put it on the sofa to fold? Why????

WHY does a cat have to leap into your seat when you get up to get a glass of water? WHY?? And why do they look so freaking surprised and insulted when they get moved from that spot? It happens EVERY time so why be surprised?

WHY is it that regardless of the temperature in the house a cat will sit on an unattended heating pad as though it's sub zero temperatures in the house?