Things Said Tonight That Probably Should Not Have Been...

The nipple is on the loose!!! Help the nipple!! It needs mouth-to-mouth!

Yeah, well you don't know how I like to play.

Aww damn! Now I'm going to have to take care of the check! And I didn't even bring my knee pads.

Wooah... I'm not responsible for what I'm saying, he is - he's the one that he'd drive.

Three out of four of us at this table prefer Patrick to Jenn so fuck you.

Well that's because I am funny... And drunk.

Wow. 5 Martinis (dirty - extra dirty) sure do liven up a couples bridal shower.