Day One Of No Microwave Oven

Breakfast:
Dear Diary,

Upon waking this morning I discovered that the state of my microwave oven was not in fact a bad dream. After repeated attempts to convince the microwave it was feeling better and would in fact warm my cup of cold cold water to a temperature that was pleasing and satisfactory for coffee consumption I realized that I was going to have to actually figure out how to warm water on the stove.

30 minutes of searching for a pan later I had it filled and sitting on a burner to warm. I sat at the computer to stare at my e-mail as I waited and dreamed of nice hot coffee. After what seemed like an eternity (must have been 5 minutes at least!) I ventured into the kitchen to find out the status of my water. It was still cold. Hmmm... What could I be doing wrong. 30 more minutes of fiddling with the stove and several burnt fingers later I had the proper heating element on beneath the pan of water. Back to the computer to actually read the e-mail this time. Several minutes later I was again concerned about my heating water as I had not yet heard the familiar ding alerting me that my water was prepared. My water was boiling by then. I still have no idea why it did not ding. I fiddled with the knob that I had previously learned controlled the heating element and turned it off. I poured (spilled) the water into the cup eagerly anticipating my caffeine. Then... eww... What's that in the water? Ugh. Seems the pan wasn't nearly clean enough and my diminished state of consciousness had impeded my detection of STUFF in the pan. *sigh* Wash pan using hand with only one burned finger, refill pan with water and repeat water warming process. This time things went smoothly. I stood in kitchen and watched as water boiled, for some reason it seemed as if it never would boil. Success finally! Hopefully next time it will take less than an hour and a half to make coffee. Gotta get that microwave fixed.

Lunch time:
Dear Diary,

My desire for left over spaghetti sauce and pasta was thwarted by the fact that microwave is still not working (I'm still checking every so often in case it was just tired or maybe it just had a viral infection). I figured that since I had managed to prepare my caffeine fix with little mishap I could managed to warm lunch on the stove top. It's amazing how quickly one remembers how to use a fire extinguisher when the bright flames of destruction are emanating from ones lunch pan. After fanning the smoke out of the house, getting the smoke detector to stop blaring, repeatedly convincing the firemen it really was just a case of burnt food and threatening/pleading with the little people to never breath a word of this to anyone, we had sandwiches for lunch. I've always liked sandwiches really, don't know why I even considered pasta.

Contemplating dinner:
Dear Diary,

I finally entered the kitchen after having two anxiety attacks from prior attempts to enter the domain of The Appliance Of Satan (the stove). A quick assessment of the contents of the freezer full of frozen veggies confirmed my fear that due to the microwave being broken I would indeed have to heat anything eaten on the dreaded Satanic stove! I briefly considered making the veggies as one would make sun tea as it is near 100 outside, but nixed the idea as I don't have any idea how long one would time 'sun veggies'. I am currently collecting menus laying about from all of the places in the area that will deliver a nice diner to my door. Though difficult with my blistered fingers and bandaged hand, I think it would be safest to avoid The Stove Of Doom and forego another inopportune meeting with hot hunky firemen (ya know, they really aren't all that open to being hit on when they think your home is a smoking inferno - gotta admire that dedication to duty though). More on dinner later, right now I'm running a bit high on caffeine as I've taken to eating my coffee by the dry spoonful to completely avoid the whole nasty affair that's still so vivid in my memory (throbbing fingers too). I think I need to keep it to the recommended serving size as the 12 or so spoonfuls I've already ingested is starting to cause hallucinations and the urge to run up and down the stairs repeatedly, brain having trouble keeping up with my fingers also.