Sunday, July 11, 2004

Super Villains Rock!

I wanna be a Super Villain. I don't want to be a Super Hero. Super Villains get cool, swank villain hide outs. They have servants and loyal (fearful) henchmen. They are never, ever put in moral dilemmas of having to choose between their great evil goal and anything else. Their relatives/loved ones are not weaknesses or liabilities - they manipulate them and bend them to their will. Super Villains also get to dress cool and they always seem to have plenty of money to finance their nefariously EVIL plans. And I bet even if they do fall behind on their bills they don't get called by creditors - who the hell would call a Super Villain on a past due bill... "Hello, Mr. I. M. Evil is it? Um yeah, I'm with Nuclear Collections and it seems that you are WAY past due on your payments for that plutonium. With late fees and past due charges looks like you owe $10,000,000,000,000,000 right now. We need to see what can be done to bring this account current, we can handle this over the phone to speed things up as we do take credit cards, otherwise I'm going to have to report you to and you do know that this will go on your credit report right?" Yeah... Sure.

Super Villains also have cool alter egos. They never have lame jobs, it's always something super cool like the president of a mega corporation or they've taken the place of the acting president of a small but wealthy country. It's never delivering working at a news paper or bagging groceries.



My favorite Super Villain - Ras Al Gul. He is one of Bat Man's villains. He's super evil, super smart and he has a Lazarus pit so he's not going to die (yes I know, geek stuff). Even when Bat Man defeats his evil plans, he never defeats Ras Al Gul. *Warning* *Warning* Comic book geek moment ahead!* Ras Al Gul has kicked most of the JLA's asses, he's done some serious ass kicking on the Legion and he still has time do some serious ass kicking in Bat Man on occasion. His daughter is in love with Bat Man but her fierce loyalty to her father always drags her into his plots and leaves her conflicted. Master manipulator. Gotta give the man his props.

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